What is life trying to teach you?

Dearest Friend, 

 

…what if it turns out that we are all students in a lifelong master’s program for an OUTSTANDING LIFE?  

 

…what if life itself is our professor and all the challenges we experience are simply assignments handed out to either successfully master or redo?

 

I like this analogy because nowhere in this story do I identify as a victim or a loser.  Life has handed me a challenging assignment and dammit, I want to get the lesson the first time.

 

FIRST of all, I need to understand and accept the assignment (in other words acknowledging and seeing the current struggle for what it is).

SECOND I need to do my research, build skills and stretch myself to meet the challenge (in other words, learn, ask for help and embrace the hard parts)  

 

My current assignment involves showing up real and honest in my relationships.  

The assignment is a challenge because I have been raised to turn myself into a pretzel for important relationships and pretzels are both boring and easily broken.  Don’t you just bristle when you are with someone who is shape-shifting to meet their perceived needs of the room?  I find these kinds of folks so tedious, and we all know how important being fully yourself is for your mental health.  To top it all off, doing the shape-shifting pretzel routine is both exhausting and frustrating because your efforts to connect with others is sabotaged by how you are showing up.      

 

Challenge accepted.  I’m going to regularly check in with myself to see if I’m feeling real or if I’m scanning the room or others for clues as to how to behave.  I’m going to give myself the time and compassion to take on this assignment.  I’ll ask for an extension if I need one but Professor Life doesn’t hand out many deadlines.  My journal holds my field notes for this assignment and I keep my focus by writing about it every morning.  I’ll find books to read (send any recommendations my way) and I’ll talk to my therapist for a deeper understanding of my issues and about strategies for success.  

 

So….you know my assignment, what assignment are you currently working on?

I would love to hear from you, email me and we can get to know each other…no filters, just the real thing.

 

Please share this email with anyone you think might enjoy our conversation.

Cheers!

xoShelley

 

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